Pyramids: The One Project I Wish I Could Have Been On

The One Project I Wish I Could Have Been On

Business Analyst to the Pyramids

If I could go back in time—and perhaps stretch the bounds of reality just a bit—there’s one dream project I’d give anything to work on as a Business Analyst: the commissioning of the Great Pyramids of Egypt.

Now, I know what you’re thinking. These colossal structures, standing the test of millennia, have inspired archaeologists, conspiracy theorists, architects, mathematicians, and even UFO enthusiasts. But imagine—just imagine—if a Business Analyst had been involved in the process. Requirements documented, scope agreed, risks assessed, celestial alignments approved by stakeholders, and one incredible Functional Requirements Document (FRD) signed off in lapis lazuli.

Let’s step into this fantasy with a BA’s mind and a curious heart.

A Brief History of the Pyramids

The Egyptian pyramids are among the most iconic architectural feats ever constructed. The Great Pyramid of Giza, built during the Fourth Dynasty for Pharaoh Khufu (circa 2600 BCE), is the last surviving wonder of the ancient world. With its precise alignment to the cardinal points and proportions that mirror the curvature of Earth, the Great Pyramid has fascinated researchers for centuries.

But Egypt isn’t the only country with pyramids.

• Sudan, surprisingly, has the most pyramids in the world—over 200 in the region of Meroë alone. These structures, while smaller, served similar ceremonial and burial purposes.

• Mexico and Central America boast the pyramids of Teotihuacan and the Mayan temples of Chichén Itzá.

• Even Bosnia has made headlines with the controversial claim of housing the largest pyramid structure in the world—the so-called “Bosnian Pyramid of the Sun,” which some believe predates all others. Learn more.

Clearly, pyramid-building was a global phenomenon, and not just in the minds of pharaohs.

Graham Hancock and the Mystery of a Lost Civilization

Enter Graham Hancock, a journalist and alternative history researcher known for his provocative books like Fingerprints of the Gods. While mainstream archaeology ties pyramid construction to ancient dynastic kings, Hancock suggests that these monuments may be the work of a far more ancient civilization—possibly wiped out by a cataclysmic event around 12,000 years ago.

Writing the FRD for the Great

Now, let’s indulge in the fantasy. I’m sitting beneath the blazing Egyptian sun, quill in hand, perhaps flanked by a few enigmatic visitors from Sirius B. I’m tasked with developing the Functional Requirements Document for the Great Pyramid of Giza.

Stakeholder Workshop: Who’s at the Table?

• Pharaoh Khufu (Project Sponsor)

• High Priests (Subject Matter Experts)

• Master Builders and Artisans

• Astronomers and Mathematicians

• Mysterious “Sky Beings” (not officially on the org chart)

Key Business Requirements:

• Construct a monument that will last 10,000+ years

• Align with the Orion constellation for spiritual and astronomical purposes

• Store sacred knowledge in coded geometry

• Possibly generate or channel Earth’s energy

• Symbolise divine connection between heaven and Earth

Functional Requirements:

• Base must be precisely square within less than 0.1% error

• Must align with cardinal points with near-perfect precision

• Use of 2.3 million limestone and granite blocks

• Internal chambers must resonate acoustically

• Materials sourced from 800+ km away (logistics anyone?)

• Hidden shafts and passages for unknown (but important) purposes

Non-Functional Requirements:

• Must withstand erosion, earthquakes, and looting for millennia

• No written instruction manuals left behind (intentional obfuscation)

• Design must encode pi (π) and the golden ratio (ϕ)

• Should correspond proportionally to Earth’s radius and circumference

Imagine the scope creep on this project…

As a Business Analyst, this is the ultimate project. It combines engineering, stakeholder management, vision alignment, cross-functional delivery, risk mitigation, and a profound sense of wonder. It also taps into that BA superpower: the ability to ask the right questions—even if the answers are thousands of years away.

Final Thoughts

While fantastical, my dream of being a Business Analyst on the Pyramid Project is rooted in something very real: curiosity, learning, and the desire to make sense of the unknown. Whether ancient or modern, sacred or strategic, every great project begins with understanding purpose—and aligning that purpose with action.

And if you ask me, there’s no more intriguing or mysterious project on Earth than the building of the pyramids.